Better Life Today

Let’s talk about rejection in a realistic way. Let’s open up the can of worms, friends. The only way to deal with this is to uncover the wound; clean it, and dress it to rid it of the inflammation and infection. Continue doing the same process daily until it heals.

After healing, the scar will be gone. Other times you might have a small line in remembrance of that scar. It’s okay. You can use it to tell someone who has an infected wound how you got yours healed and help them heal theirs. 

Let’s talk about this from sufferer to sufferer.  That is right.  I am not a scholar who has learned from books alone, but a sufferer who is healing through awareness and by working with God on a daily basis.  Sometimes, I feel so bad that I need someone else to uncover my wound and clean it – even if just for today.  Tomorrow I will have the strength to keep on going on my own again.  Well, never on my own really – always with my ever companion, God. 

 A little bit on how I got hurt:

My dad was brutally abused by his dad as a child and that made him very angry and sour – full of unforgiveness. As a perfectionist, he was never satisfied with his family. I was never able to measure up to his standards. Since I can remember, I was the stupid piece of “something,” “good-for-nothing” who will never do anything right.  

I remember being 6 years old. No matter how much my little hands shook trying to fold dad’s handkerchief correctly, I was never able to do it well enough. I really wanted to impress my dad, and I needed my dad’s approval, but it never happened.

As the oldest child, I instinctively played the role defender. For example, I once stepped in while my father was hitting my little brother. “Stop hitting him and hit me instead,” I said. I was afraid but courageous at the same time.

At that time, I was the defender against the monster in my world. However, I later realized that my dad was not a monster, but he was a badly hurt person who never got the help he needed. That was something I didn’t completely realize until my father got Alzheimer’s disease and I had to take care of him. 

Because I was already in a relationship with Christ, I was able to understand and hurt compassionately for my dad and forgive him. 

However, my friends, I must tell you that I grew up all broken up and hurt. I always felt out of place and unable to fit in.  Insecure, I became a people-pleaser without realizing it. I would offer without being asked and give of my self even when I could not afford to; and, in many instances, without the reciprocation that I expected. I worked hard to fit in and be accepted. As a teenager, I had boyfriends that were no good for me, and never even thought about ending it. I guess I had no self-value.

There is help. There is healing and you and I can have happy fulfilled lives. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, my friend. You are not alone, and I am not alone.

We can do this. We will do this.

We deserve good things like everyone else that God has created. Though this is not a book, a blog, let’s go on a journey of healing together.

Awareness is the first component we need in order to find direction and a path to healing. Without it we can neither move forward nor can we grow or have proper direction.

Imagine trying to find an address in the middle of the night while wearing sunglasses  In order to arrive at your destination, you need to:

1. Take your sunglasses off. We do this through awareness.
2. Type the address on the GPS. (Translation) = Pray to God about your pain, needs, plans, etc.
3. Listen to the voice on the GPS. = Be open to hearing the voice of the Holy Spirit.
4. Follow it’s directions until you arrive at your destination. = Follow the voice of the Spirit, do not ignore it.